no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
