So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
