I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
