I CAN MOONWALK!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
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