She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
