I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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