i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
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