She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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