I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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