I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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