I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
