Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
