I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
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