my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
