she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
