You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
