I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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