He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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