Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
