Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Buhtt sex?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
