she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
