about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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