Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
