do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
