I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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