I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
