There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
