I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
