you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
