im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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