There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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