The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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