She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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