I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
