Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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