Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
