he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
