She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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