Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Randomize
