Where are you?
In a non slutty way
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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