How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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