ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize