Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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