id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
