What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
