Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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