im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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