Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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