how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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