Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
